There’s no doubt in my mind about how much I love being a mamma. Do I love all of it? Is it easy all the time? NO. But I definitely wouldn’t change much of how my life is as a mom. It’s exactly as hard as they say, and I have more love in my heart than I physically know what to do with.
But, it IS hard.
One thing that is particularly hard for me, honestly, is to just let them BE KIDS and to RELAX. I mean, when I write that out, it sounds amazingly stupid and crazy at the same time. What do you mean it’s HARD to let them be kids? Well, sometimes it’s just hard for me to remember that they aren’t little adults. They aren’t going to act like perfect human beings all the time. And they are exploring this earth and seeing this world through a kiddos eyes.
Which is something I should really try more often.
The other day, Cruz was eating lunch when I looked down to see him eating his grapes with a toy claw that he just got at school. My instant thought was to declare, ‘STOP THAT. YOU CAN’T EAT YOUR GRAPES LIKE THAT.’ And to ask him to return to eating them like a normal human being. I literally had to bite my tongue and review the situation.
Why NOT allow him to eat his grapes like that? Yes, it may not be proper manners, but it’s OK to break SOME rules now and then. He is exploring, trying new things, using new motor skills and more importantly- he’s having FUN. I sat there and watched him and was honestly sad that I almost asked him to stop eating his grapes like that. He was loving it. And he’s a little boy who needs to use his imagination to pretend he’s a crane gobbling up all the grapes.
So I saved my ‘NO’. I realized in that moment, that saving our ‘no’s’ as parents could be a very important part of parenting. Our kids DO need to hear the word ‘no’. There are too many very spoiled kids in this world. Kids who are never disciplined and who are never told ‘no’.
There are also kids that are told ‘no’ too much. Kids who never get to play, explore, try new things and just BE a KID. I decided in that moment, that saving my ‘no’ for another time was the best decision in that moment. If ALL our kids hear is no, will they REALLY listen to us when it counts?
I sat there and watched him happily devour his food with his new claw. And I was very glad that I didn’t reprimand him or even ask him to act like a mini adult for that moment. I saved the ‘no’ and praying that when I use my ‘no’s’, that they count for something. That my kids don’t view me as the mom that ALWAYS needs to say no. But that when I do, I really do mean it.
Let them be kids sometimes. Save your ‘no’s’ for the moments when it REALLY matters. And let them use their imagination to explore new things. It really IS going to be ok. I think we ALL could take a lesson or two from our kids, if we really just watch them and the wonder that they have for this world.
Maybe we ALL should pretend to be cranes at the dinner table more often, like my sweet boy who loves trucks more than most things. What did it hurt?
Absolutely nothing. It filled his little heart with joy and it taught this mamma a lesson about when is a good time to say ‘no’, and when it’s not.
Save those ‘no’s’ for when it counts, mamma. You won’t regret it.