The other day I was getting ready for work in my bathroom. You know, applying makeup, spraying my hair, getting dressed. Cruz will sometimes hang out with me in there and watch me or play with his trucks on the ground. He likes to try my headbands on or (TRY) to sling shot them across the room. What a boy! HA.
So while I was getting ready the other day, I could sense that he was looking up at me. Just as I was about to look down at him I hear,
“Yes?”, I ask.
AND THEN HE SAYS:
“Someday when I get married, are you going to come with me?”
*Let’s pause for a minute because this is the part of the story where I almost completely melted into a puddle of mush.*
My eyes teared up a little bit and I stood speechless for a second as his big blue eyes looked up at me. It was the sweetest question I’ve ever heard. I said,
“Well bud, someday when you’re ready to get married to a lucky lady, I don’t really think you’ll want me to come with you, even though mommy would love to live with you all the time. When you grow up, you’ll get to buy a house of your own, and have a wife and you’ll be a daddy too!”
He stared up at me taking it all in when he finally said,
“No, I don’t think so mom. I’m going to live with you FOREVER.“
HA. I smiled and just agreed with him for now. I know his heart will obviously change as he grows up and he WILL one day want to move out, be on his own and eventually start his own family. It didn’t make sense to argue in that moment. I didn’t want to scare him or make him feel the pressures of being a grownup right now. But it was the sweetest little question he’s ever asked.
I let it be a reminder to me about what exactly we are doing here. We are raising these two boys to love Jesus and one day move out and to function in society. They will one day have wives and children of their own. And they won’t live with us forever. And in the moments of these years where they are small, and the end seems dauntingly far away, I know that it is not. They will grow up in a flash; faster than I can even imagine. My time with them here at my home will eventually end. And they WILL make their way into the world as full grown men, whether I want it to happen or not.
The thought makes me SO excited for them and also full of heartache at the thought of letting them go. Such a mix of emotions. I’ve been thinking about his little question a lot lately, and it totally touches my heart. It’s a reminder to me to CHERISH the time that I have with them. To hold dear the days that he plays trucks at my feet while I put my makeup on. To slow down a bit and make the time we got to all live together MEMORABLE. To hold tight to the tiny moments that we have today.
His little words are a reminder to me to STAY IN THE PRESENT with your kids. It won’t be long before it’s gone. AND you can guarantee that I’ll be sharing this story at his future wedding someday!
*Photo taken by me for my Instagram. You can follow me there at @stellardayblog.