A little over a week ago, I had the greatest, most honorable pleasure of praying with my four year old son to accept Christ into his heart. His little story is amazing to me, and a reminder of how even though I might make mistakes as his parent, God can use even those for his glory. I share this with you now to remind you of that, dear mom, that even if you feel imperfect and like you might be failing, God is in control and will use ALL things for his good. AND to encourage you to be praying for your kids. That they might understand and accept with a childlike faith at an early life and begin to live their entire lives for Christ.
What a blessing. Here’s his story. I’ll try to make it quick.
On a random Tuesday night about a week ago, Jason and I were having a hard time getting our kids to settle into bed. They share a room with bunk beds, and lets just say the transition has been less than pleasant. Would I recommend bunk beds as a way of life? I DON’T KNOW YET. Ugh.
So we were coming into their room for the UMP-TEENTH time to tell them to “GO TO BED”, when we saw Cruz sitting on his top bunk, with his water bottle, shaking the water EV.ER.Y.WHERE.
We clean it up, discipline him for not obeying, and as he’s climbing back into bed I decide to tell him-
WHY DID I DECIDE TO TELL HIM THIS????
I decide to tell/inform/educate him that we need to be careful with water in our rooms and that we shouldn’t shake it all around. Because if we do, it COULD get on the lights, lamps, cords, electrical outlets and (wait for it)- START A FIRE.
I have never seen a child’s eyes get so big as his did when I said these words. IMMEDIATELY, I regretted it and leapt into his own brain to see what he was envisioning. Just himself, trapped in his own room at night, while it was burning up in flames.
MOM OF THE YEAR YOU GUYS. MOM OF THE YEAR. *sigh*
I could not take the words back. So after even MORE time of endlessly comforting him and desperately trying to undo the damage I had just unintentionally done, he FINALLY went to sleep.
Mom of the year.
I spent the entire next day STILL trying to extinguish (no pun intended. Ok kinda.) his little fears about our house burning down. To no end, he was convinced that we were going to perish in flames.
I hated myself for saying it, not gonna lie.
So fast forward to Wednesday. Jason and I serve at an AWESOME high school ministry together and we are there late almost every Wednesday night. We arrived at home to a dark home, as as soon as we walked in, I could sense Cruz tense up as he realized that he was going to have to go to bed in the room with the imaginary flames. We started singing, praying and have a delicate (I promise this time) conversation about how the house isn’t going to burn down, here’s who we call if we see fire, this is how we get out and mommy and daddy are going to take care of you.
“You don’t need to worry Cruz. We’ve got you, we love you, and even though bad and scary things can sometimes happen, we are going to make sure you are safe.”
He wasn’t convinced. We went round and round. FINALLY, I reminded him one last time and said,
“You know buddy, if you wake up in the middle of the night and if you are afraid, you know you can just call out to Jesus, right? He promises he will come near to us, protect us and be with us. Because he loves us.”
He sat up on his tummy in his top bunk, paused for a second and said:
“Hey mom? Does Jesus come live inside our hearts?”
I almost fell over. I have waited for this little question to come out of his mouth, and had always wondered when he would understand this concept. Was it now?
“Yes, Cruz.”, I said, “Jesus will come live in anyone’s heart if we believe in him and if we ask him to come live there. Do you believe in him?”
He paused, blinked, and then said:
“Yes……… but mommy? Did Jesus die on the cross for us?”
Blinking back tears, I said:
“Yes he did Cruz. He died for us because without him we can’t be with him. If we believe he died for us because we aren’t perfect, then we can be with him in heaven someday when we die. Do you believe in him?”
“Yes mommy, I do.”
I then asked him if he wanted to pray with me to ask Jesus to live in his heart, and he said yes. I was hesitant that he was understanding, and expected him to act silly during the prayer. But he didn’t. He repeated every line with me, asked my Jesus, my Lord and King to come be King in his little life that very night. I stood by his bed, prayed with him, hugged him for a long time after and couldn’t believe that I would be so very blessed to be able to witness a child- MY CHILD- accept Christ into their hearts.
What a moment!
I reminded him again, that he has no reason to be afraid. Jesus lives in his heart, will protect him all the days of his life, and if he’s scared to ask Jesus to draw near.
And you know what?
Cruz went right to bed that night without any issue, and hasn’t mentioned the house burning down since. Praise God!
I stood in the hallway for a good bit after I walked out, cried, and thanked the Lord for that moment. I thanked Him for using my mistake to bring my son into the kingdom. To teach him that even though humans might make mistakes, Jesus doesn’t. And he opened his little heart that night and filled his little life.
To say I am thankful feels like a massive understatement.
Cruz now goes around telling EVERYONE that he prayed and asked Jesus into his heart. Already sharing his little testimony with anyone who will listen. It makes me tear up every time.
So, dear mom. Pray for your children. You never know when their little hearts will be open. Ask God to use you in their lives- your greatest mission field right now. And you HAVE to know- you may be feeling like you’re failing at being a mom. You might feel like you’re saying/doing things that are for sure screwing things up.
God is greater than that. He’s bigger than your imperfections or mine. And he can use them whenever he wants to bring a child, adult or even an elderly person who’s on their death bed to Christ. Stay faithful. For our children are only entrusted to us anyways. They are ultimately HIS.
Cruz is HIS. Forever and ever, amen.
The angels sang and danced that night. And I slept a great, peaceful sleep knowing that when we die and this earth passes away, Cruz will be with us in heaven.
I couldn’t have asked for more.